So, I am going to be participating in the Open Adoption Roundtable the question this time being, “Do you remember when you first heard about open adoption?”
As I recall, the first time I remember hearing or reading actually about open adoption was during one of many general adoption searches I was doing when we had decided that adoption was the way we were going to try to grow our family. I did tons of research and a great deal of it on the internet. I stumbled across a blog Amstel Life and read all about this first mom’s story and her life in open adoption. I remember discussing it with my husband and liking the idea of being open but being a bit shocked and uncomfortable with the idea of how open they were. Makes me laugh now being in a super open adoption very similar to the way that one was described to me! Lol It was my first peak in to that world and prompted more reading and research, discussions with my niece who is adopted internationally and getting her opinion (she is 17) and eventually deciding that this was the path we were meant to take. If I really stretch my mind the first idea of open relationships out of the norm came probably a year or so before that when I was at a nurse/healthcare professional conference about embryo adoption. At that there were two families who spoke who were connected via an embryo “adoption”. I put that in quotes because in legal terms it is not an adoption at all but yet a “transfer of property”. My point is, that these two families spoke on what a blessing they felt this open relationship was and that siblings knew each other etcetera. My husband had come along for the ride on this conference and I remember going back up to the room that evening in tears recounting the story of these families, how beautiful it was and I wondered if we could ever be a part of something like that. Not sure why my response was different with one versus the other, except maybe the conference they were people all in front of me discussing it, and they all seemed genuinely okay, and happy and to have love for each other, so maybe seeing the love emanate made it more acceptable. Not sure….but it definitely moved me.
Cut to now, we are so lucky to be a part of something so crazy and beautiful. I can’t imagine it any other way.